An 8 year old boy named William once wrote his pastor a letter. "Dear Pastor, I know God wants us to live in peace with everyone, but He never met my sister!"
Could you write a letter like that? Do you know any irritating people who "get on your last nerve"? Some people will go to great lengths to prove themselves right. (ouch, could that be me?) Ever tried to be a peacemaker with someone who knows it all?
When the angels announced Jesus' birth to the shepherds, in unison they sang this praise song:
"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth, peace, good will toward men." The Prince of Peace (Is.9:6) came to earth to teach us how to be peacemakers.
All of us know people, have situations, and deal with things everyday that need us to be peacemakers. Homes are chaotic where there is no peace. Marriage is stressful where there is no peace between husband and wife. The workplace can be a "downright mean place to be" when there is no one to step into the situation and be the peacemaker. And oh my word, what does a church family look like when the peacemakers don't do the peacemaking?
There are times when I don't want to be the peacemaker, times when I want to be the one with the hurt feelings, and times when I just plain ole want to be mad. But I'm not given that luxury by my Prince of Peace. Because you see, He has called you and He has called me to be the peaceful one in our marriage, in our home, in our church, and in our workplace. He has called you and me to be His peace to those who know no peace. And when I refuse to be a peacemaker, I miss out on the blessing of influencing those around me and being known as "being called a child of God." (Matt. 5:9) A wise teacher told me many, many years ago that the more mature Christian in a relationship will be the one to apologize first and seek peace.
Is your relationship with your husband worth an "I'm sorry"? When you have those "confrontations" with your teenager, you find out you were wrong, and you say, "I'm sorry", that throws cold water on a very heated situation. Even a 4 year will benefit from a Mom who isn't afraid to admit she was wrong, or that she lost her cool, or she overreacted.
We live in a very volatile world where tempers threaten to explode over the least little offense. Couples divorce, children rebel, churches split, people loose their jobs because no one steps up to be the peacemaker. In order to live in peace with those we love and those we simply have to "endure", we have to recognize first and foremost that "God is the author of peace." (1 Cor.14:33) I am to be a peacemaker simply because God wrote the word, He made the plan. I am to make it my mission in life to "live in peace", and when I do, I have this promise from God: "and the God of love and peace will be with me." (2 Cor. 13:11)
All of this sounds so noble and sweet and we all agree that being a peacemaker can change any situation. But how do I do that when I've been the one wronged, when I've been the one hurt?
Here are 6 things that help me choose peace over chaos;
1. Use kind, soft words. (Prov. 15:1) Kind words plus a smile are a peaceful combination.
2. My tone of voice can easily start an argument, or settle it.
3. Listen to the other person, don't interrupt, don't become defensive.
4. Be humble. Yes, I know it is hard when you know you are right, but humility goes a long way in defusing a heated conversation. God will resist my pride (work against me in the situation), but when I humble myself before Him, He gives me "more grace"; more than enough of His endless grace to be the peacemaker. (1 Peter 5:5)
5. Don't assume the worse. Have you done this, I have; make up my own version of the situation in my head and find out I could not have been farther from the truth. Peacemakers wait until all the facts are in.
6. Be ready to forgive, or to ask for forgiveness. Impossible to be a peacemaker without a forgiving heart.
(and the humility to ask for forgiveness.)
Being a peacemaker is a continuing "work in progress." As long as we live in the flesh, we will have to work to bring peace to our own lives and to our famililes, but we can do it! Our Prince of Peace has already paved the way.
And may I add just one more, very important thing? It is the work of the Holy Spirit to produce peace in me, because you see, peace is a fruit of the Spirit. (Gal. 5:22,23) And it is only as He produces that precious fruit in my life, that I can be the peace in someone else's life.
Holy Spirit, I am depending upon You to develop the fruit of peace in my life, that I might be a peacemaker.