Do you ever feel like a tiny little speck in a great big world? I do. It is a lonely feeling, a feeling that no one sees you, or understands how you feel or what you need. I remember the first time I felt the overwhelming reality that I was indeed a tiny little speck in a great big world. The front porch of our house had two swings, one on each end, and my sisters and I would often sit in those swings and make up all sorts of games. We imagined the swings were airplanes, or trains, or even ships on the ocean and we were all on a journey to a far away land. We especially loved to play those games on rainy summer nights and on one such stormy night while pretending we were in the middle of the ocean, I looked out into that big front yard with all those trees and felt so tiny, so small. I remember exactly where I was, which swing I was in, and just how I felt: a tiny little speck in a great big world.
Many years have passed since that dark, rainy night in that front porch swing, but I can still experience feeling small and unseen. In the Old Testament book of Genesis, a young woman named Hagar experienced the same feelings: she felt alone and that no one saw her.
Hagar was a maid servant to Sarah, Abraham's wife. She was an Egyptian and she became a part of their household when Abraham had taken his clan to Egypt, and because of his deception to the Pharaoh, he was commanded to leave. The Pharaoh had given Hagar to Sarah while Sarah was living in Pharaoh's house and when Abraham was ordered to leave, Hagar went with them and she became the property of Sarah. Her life was completely controlled by her mistress, she had no say-so at all, and when Sarah was unable to have children, she gave Hagar to Abraham as his concubine. The child they would have together would be considered the child of Sarah and Abraham. But as soon as Hagar was expecting, everything changed. Whether it was jealousy or pride, the two women found themselves in a much different relationship than before. Hagar became insolent and when Sarah complained to Abraham, he told her to take control of the situation. She did, and when she disciplined Hagar, Hagar ran away.
In Genesis 16, Hagar finds herself in the wilderness, all alone, and afraid. But then an amazing thing happened: the incarnate Lord appeared to her, an Egyptian girl, a Gentile, and asked her why she was in that wilderness place. She told Him she was done, (I've said that a few times) she was leaving, (felt like doing that a few times) she said, "I'm running and I'm not going back!"
In verses 9-12, the Lord told her to return to Sarah and to "submit" to Sarah's authority. And then He made her some amazing promises that let her know she was not alone, she was important, He saw her. She was expecting a child and that child would become a great man and do great things.
I love reading the Hebrew names for God and I want you to mark Genesis 16:14 in your Bible and when you feel all alone, that no one sees you, this verse will assure you that you are seen and known by God: v14; Then she called the name of the Lord Who spoke to her, Jehovah Roi, the God Who Sees; "For," she said, "Have I also seen Him Who sees me."
Maybe you are in a wilderness place today. Maybe your wilderness is financial, or a relationship with someone you love is strained, or maybe you are feeling alone because of your health. No matter your wilderness place, or how alone or unseen you may feel, Jehovah Roi sees you. He sees exactly where you are physically and spiritually, and He cares.
Hagar was obedient to God. She went back to Sarah and to her home. She had a son and named him Ishmael, just as the Lord commanded. God kept HIs promises to her, and Ishmael became a great man. I believe Hagar often called out to Jehovah Roi and each time she did she knew that "she had seen Him Who saw her."
Are you feeling like a tiny little speck in a great big world? Look to Jehovah Roi because He is looking at you.
Penny
